Posted on January 12, 2016
Our Homeschooling Journey
So I have really struggled with what to title this post. We fit so many different topics for those interested in learning more about Homeschooling. Both myself and my husband, Jason, work full time jobs. Jason is and active duty chaplain in the US Army and I am a physician working shifts in the Emergency Room. We both have extremely variable schedules and this makes it difficult to carve out the family time we want with our four wonderful children. When I was younger, I never even considered homeschooling my children. If the subject ever came up I had the exact same questions that I now get asked. What about socialization? How do you find the time? Can they play sports? How do you know what to teach? Why can’t public school work as well for them as it did for you? Then I met a man in the military and I chose a career that gave me a very atypical schedule.
I still didn’t see a way for it to work but as the time grew near for my oldest to start kindergarten I realized I had to try. I was working an average of fourteen 12 hour shifts a month including 2-3 weekends and 3-4 nights. I was concerned that I wouldn’t see Melissa for sometimes weeks once she started school because of the way my schedule worked. In addition, we are a military family and I knew we would be dealing with multiple moves during the course of our children’s school careers. I wanted to give them as much stability as possible and a consistent challenging curriculum. Of course, there were also multiple stories of changes being made in the schools themselves and children getting in trouble for a range of reasons from living their faith to pointing an imaginary gun at fellow students in play. I can honestly say I am not a fan of the new Common Core initiative and other changes including the removal of cursive handwriting from schools. These aren’t all the reasons why we decided to try Homeschooling but they are some. Every family has different needs and challenges and there are many creative ways to address those needs and challenges out there if you do your research. I’m not completely ruling out the kids returning to public school life depending on our families needs in the future because you never know what the future may hold but we are taking each year and child at a time.
Melissa turned five in February and was due to start Kindergarten August 2015. We made the decision to try homeschooling so I decided to start in January to see if it would work for us. When we started I was so nervous that I wouldn’t know what to teach her or what order to teach it in or that she would get behind. I did tons of research and I will try to blog some of my favorite Resources in another post soon. I started out trying to design my own curriculum from different resources and quickly found that it was difficult to keep up with in light of my work schedule and I still was worried about if I was teaching appropriate level concepts and how to judge her grasp of new concepts. I had a vision of how I wanted school for us to be but no clear path. I went back to the net and looked at online curriculum as well as online schools. I scoured blogs of working parents and military families. I looked at all the different types of homeschooling schools of thought from Charlotte Mason to unschooling. There is so much out there it is overwhelming for the beginner.
I finally found Time 4 Learning (http://www.time4learning.com/) which is an online curriculum program that costs $20/month for the first child and $15/month for additional children for Pre-K through 8th grade. High school is $30/month. We started Melissa in Kindergarten and Bobby in the Pre-K 1 as he was only 3 at the time. It was a God Send. The lesson plans are easy to follow and you can make your own custom schedule for each child and manage breaks for holidays and the lessons themselves are easy to follow and interactive. Melissa loved it and was soon begging to do schoolwork. She has finished the kindergarten curriculum and is well into the first grade lessons. Bobby has completed Pre-K1 and Pre-K 2 and started some of the Kindergarten lessons. However, he and Eli are attending a Lutheran preschool three mornings a week and so we are not looking to fully start the kindergarten material for him yet.
We have found that a rigid daily schedule doesn’t work well for us and so we have established a weekly task list. Melissa gets a new list on Monday that includes her language arts, math, science and social studies lessons from Time 4 Learning (T4L) with worksheets as well as her spelling words, Bible reading and the chapters that we are reading from our Charlotte Mason curriculum. With my current schedule I am at work on Tuesday/Thursdays for 24 hours so Monday is our heavy work day. We get a head start on T4L in the morning while her brothers are at preschool. Some days we accomplish a lot of it and some days we are lucky to get through a section. I will say that the task list has significantly helped with motivation for Melissa because when she’s done with her weekly tasks she’s done to assigned school work and every thing else we do is fun learning. We pick her brothers up at noon and all head for some lunch. After lunch Eli (2) and Zachary (10 months) lay down for a daily nap. Bobby (4) does sometimes and others he stays up with us. We work on art, reading from our chapter books and table manners at our daily tea parties. We spend time outdoors enjoying nature or at a minimum watching the birds at our feeder outside out kitchen window. We build forts, put on plays or dance recitals on our pretend stage, made from large foam hardwood floor play flooring at Toys R Us, and have mock battles with light sabers, pirate swords or ninja gear. Sometimes we use this for quiet time and Lego building. I am always fascinated by the scenes they build. Once the boys wake up its playtime and cooking dinner until Daddy gets home and then family time or finishing up work while Daddy takes over some of the play time until bedtime.
Bobby performing a Rock show on our Stage. Performance time is a fun time for everyone. We have Ballet and Tap dances, Rock bands, dramatic plays, and karaoke. Everyone in the family gets involved.
We try to finish our “book” work by Thursday afternoons that way Fridays and the weekends we have time for more exploratory style learning. We spend days at the zoo, take trips to larger cities near us like Atlanta, St. Louis, Louisville, Memphis, Gatlinburg and trips to our local parks, art studio and botanical gardens. As a family we love Theme parks, particularly Walt Disney World, and so we have visited many. Thankfully most of them you can find plenty of educational topics to discuss from wildlife conservation to mining for minerals using water sluices, to engineering of different types of park rides and related physics principles.
Pictured Above- Dollywood Theme Park and Parrot Mountain- Gatlinburg, TN
Over time, as I have become more comfortable with homeschooling myself, we have added in some Charlotte Mason ideals and even a lot of un-schooling tendencies. I have recently been introduced to unique group actually based near my hometown in Virgina Beach, Va called Wild and Free (www.bewildandfree.org) which focuses on the adventure of learning. I have downloaded their free trial bundle and am looking forward to subscribing to their monthly bundles. I will let you know what I think as we have tried more of them. As I look back over the last year my reasons for homeschooling have grown and my regrets for not going the traditional route have all but disappeared. With all the other roles I fill including working mom and Army spouse, homeschooling might not look like the best choice and it is a great deal of work. I am lucky that I have an amazing Nanny who makes sure that on the days I work she encourages Melissa in competing her daily tasks and helps her when she doesn’t understand a concept without whom I our weeks would be much more stressful. However, even if I did not have that extra help, I would still choose to follow this path. Watching the understanding for new concepts in my daughter’s eyes and the seeing the joy of accomplishing something that was giving her trouble or when she gets to contribute something she has learned recently to the conversation is truly magical. Homeschooling is not for everyone but I am glad it is for us.
Updated on December 31, 2015
Goodbye 2015, Hello 2016
What is it about the start of a new year that gets us so inspired? Is it the idea of a fresh start? The realization that we’ve lost another year of our time here on Earth? A time for reflection of the previous year that motivates us to want to do things differently? Or is it the recent celebration of the birth and new life of our Savior and the promise of salvation that comes with it? Whatever the reason , we often spend this time of year reflecting on the past and preparing for our future.
As I look back over 2015 we’ve had a lot of changes in our lives. In January we started homeschooling our two oldest children for Kindergarten and Preschool. Next week I will be writing a post about what got us started in Homeschooling and what I’ve learned from it. In February, we had our fourth child. He was born three days after Melissa, our oldest, turned five. To say that the chaos in our lives increased is an understatement by far… I don’t know what quiet time is anymore with four children under the age of five in the house. Just a few short weeks after Zachary’s birth we lost our beloved Great Dane Parris to a small bowel obstruction. It was so hard telling the kids as they had been at my parents for a visit when it happened and it was really the first big loss that they could understand, particularly Melissa. At Christmas, she cried because Parris wasn’t here with her.
Spring became even more hectic as I went back to work at the beginning of March and in April had to re-certify my Family Medicine Boards which is done every 7-10 years. I spent months studying and taking additional required tests by the Board. The highlights of that time period though was a visit from my sister and her family for Spring Break as well as one from one of my best friends and her two children who I hadn’t seen in several years. My family got to take a tour of the Grand Ole Opry and the Country Music Hall of Fame. We went shopping for boots on Broadway and even got to try out a couple of the great restaurants in Downtown. We also took lots of pictures of the kids and while my friend was here we got to scrapbook and tried a styled tea party photography shoot in our backyard. Big lesson learned, do not try to take pictures of multiple children during their nap time… I was so thankful to just make it through that period of the year with my sanity. I know the Lord was certainly carrying me like in my favorite poem “Footprints” because I never could have made it through without his help and the support of my wonderful husband, Jason.
By May/June things were starting to calm down some. Jason went to a Medical Ministry course in San Antonio for two weeks and was was able to join him for the weekend. We had a great time exploring the Spanish Missions with his fellow Chaplains on a field trip Saturday. My header photo for this website is actually taken from the first mission we visited, Espada. I loved the peace and tranquility that I felt there. You could tell that it was filled with God’s presence. Unfortunately, my camera battery died just as we were starting so I only got a few pictures as I had no back up. I was able to get a picture of Jason standing in the ruins of the old church where the altar would have been. What an amazing feeling as a priest to be standing in the Holy Altar at a mission from 1731. To know that you are standing where other priests have stood for centuries delivering the message of God’s love and forgiveness.
One night after Jason’s return home while trying to figure out what to do to entertain our kids, we decided to have a outdoor movie night with our kids and some of our neighbors. We set up the projector screen in the back yard a played Toy Story, the kids were glued to the TV and even the ones who weren’t were running around the yard having fun with each other. This led to the start of Wednesday night movies on the lawn. What a great way to connect with others! Every Wednesday our house opened up to those who wanted to stop by be it neighbors, co-workers or friends. The kids had a movie to watch or played in the playroom and the adults had some time to relax and unwind. We provided drinks and told everyone just to bring their dinner and use our kitchen/grill to cook. Some nights it was just our family and some nights we had a house full of families. The kids absolutely loved having others to play with and it was a great lesson for them in many ways from preparing a house for guests to sharing their toys. For Jason and I, it was a way to connect to the people in our lives in a deeper and more meaningful way.
Jason’s mother also saw big changes in her life in 2015. She was able to move from Florida to Tennessee just south of us and near where his Brother and sister-in- law are stationed at the beginning of summer. It was a great move for her and with us being so close has allowed her to really be able to enjoy all of her grandchildren in a way she wasn’t able to do in Florida. The kids love slumber parties at Grandma’s. During the summer, we also added a new Great Dane to the family. Anna is a sweet, blue girl and the kids love her. She certainly growing like a weed.
As we headed into the fall, life started to get busy again! Melissa finished the Kindergarten curriculum that we were using and started the first grade section. We decided to put Bobby and Eli into a preschool down the road from us on MWF from 9-12. My schedule had changed in the summer to 24 hour shifts which gave us a lot more family time on the weekends than we had been getting. We spent a great deal of those weekends on the road either with Jason’s Strong Bonds marriage retreats or exploring the areas around us. We loved these adventures. Our kids even started asking us could we go stay in a hotel when we were home. We were able to visit different churches in different cities (I love church architecture) and see first hand what was special about each area. There is so much variety in our world and it is amazing to look at it and remember that it was all part of God’s perfect plan. Of course, traveling with four children is not easy or inexpensive but we found that every area, particularly St. Louis, has great free/low cost things to see or do you just have to look for them and plan ahead. Active duty Military can get a free pass for themselves and their families to the National Park Service which is a huge benefit when traveling. We were also blessed to be able to visit Jason’s Dad and Stepmother at their Cabin in the Blue Ridge Mountains. We spent a weekend taking a train ride and browsing the unique stores in the little towns tucked in the mountains. We saw so many wonderful things and built so many great memories during these trips.
During December, Jason spent 10 days in the field training and the kids and I especially, were blessed to have my parents visit. I was also able to spend a few days with my dear sister-in-law, Allison Dechenne of Allie Dee Photography taking pictures and having some girl bonding time with our shared passion of photography. Christmas was a time of joy and celebration for the Birth of our Savior. We attended a wonderful mass on Christmas Eve at Holy Trinity Greek Orthodox Church in Nashville with Father Gregory giving a very uplifting Christmas message. Santa brought us fun presents to play with and each of the children received their own nativities for their rooms.
Winter hasn’t really come to us here in Tennessee yet this year. We have had the shorter days which I never love but thankfully, at least for me, have enjoyed great fall like weather except for a few days here and there. This has allowed us more time for enjoying the outside. I love sitting on our back porch reading or watching the kids play. It also has given us more time to enjoy outdoor outings like the Lexington Horse Park. However, just this week temperatures have started dropping again and I see the signs that winter weather is probably here to stay for a while.
Overall, 2015 was a wonderful year for us full of love and laughter. At times the chaos could be overwhelming but God always helped us to find a way through it. We are so blessed to now have four happy, healthy children, a loving family, careers that we enjoy and wonderful, lasting friendships. 2016 looks to be another busy year with our next move on the horizon in early summer. I haven’t made any specific resolutions for the New Year though I hope to spend more time with the kids really treasuring this season of our lives that is already speeding by like a freight train and less time stressed about the unimportant trivialities in life that will always be there in one form or another. Most importantly, I want to continue to keep my focus on God so that I may live my life in such a way that when people meet and get to know me I am a living example of the light of Christ and the love that he has for all of us. I look forward to seeing all of you in the New Year!
Posted on December 25, 2015
Christmas Joy
And suddenly two became three. I still remember vividly the moment it went from just my husband and I to a family of three. The birth of our daughter was infinitely precious to us. I cannot imagine the joy that our Mother Mary and Joseph must have felt upon the birth of Jesus. To hold and cuddle the Christ Child and kiss the face of God….
Whenever, I think of Jesus’ birth I wonder how much of God’s plan did Mary know? Did she realize in those early moments that her baby had come to save the world? Or did she look at him, as I have looked at each of my own children and see only the blessing that the gift of his life was in that moment and wonder about where his path would lead him in life?
Each year, the feast of the Nativity reminds us of the greatest gift that we have been given. The birth of a Savior and the chance to renew our relationship with God and draw closer to him. The promise that whosoever believeth in him shall not perish but have everlasting life. A God who loved us so much that he gave his only son for each of us. What an amazing gift we have received and continue to daily be blessed by.
We also received the gift of role models in parenthood. Mary and Joseph were people just like us and yet because of their own obedience to God’s will they were blessed to be the parents of the Savior. They experienced the combination of joy and trepidation that comes with parenthood. They demonstrate for us how to place God first in our lives and to seek his will not only for ourselves but for our children as well.
The Nativity feast has in the past few years taken on new significance for me as I feel that it is through being a mother to my children I have grown the closest to our Father in heaven. I struggle daily with how to guide my children in making the right choices while still respecting their free will and individual personalities. I ache when I see them hurt and am joyous when they succeed. I try to treasure every moment I spend with them even though I am all to often guilty of not using that time as wisely as I can. I find that non important things often get the priority and lately have found myself greatly saddened by a feeling of too little time. I see our time with them at this stage passing by in the blink of an eye. I wonder is this the way that God feels when he watches our lives? Does he wish that we would spend more time with him in prayer and reflection sharing our burdens and our success?
So on this the birthday of the King or Kings and Prince of Peace may everyone rejoice in the promise that was wrapped in swaddling and laid in a manger. May we take time from our worldly presents and reflect on where God is leading us in the next year. For those of with children, may we seek his guidance in helping them find their own path and serve as role models for them by living our lives so that we are his light in the world. May we pray for those persecuted for their faith that they may know the comfort of his love and that he send a champion to protect them. May we remember that each of us is a child of God and that he is our biggest cheerleader but also our hardest taskmaster, for he knows each of us as individuals and just like our worldly parents only wants whats best for us.
Merry Christmas! Christ is Born! Glorify Him!
Updated on December 22, 2015
Fort Campbell, KY
Fort Campbell, Ky- home to the Screaming Eagles of the 101 Airborne Division. When we arrived her in April 2014, Jason had just finished Chaplain Basic Officer’s Course and I was moving away from home for the first time in 30 years. To say we had to hit the ground running with this fast paced unit was putting it mildly. From the time we knew where we were heading, I scoured the internet high and low for any usable information on the base, the area or life as a military chaplain spouse. I figured someone had to have figured it all out by now if I could just find the info. Unfortunately, most of the questions I had went unanswered. However, I was very appreciative of all the wonderful military spouses here before me who had taken the time to post their thought online.
The Fort Campbell Base itself is an older base. They have recently re-done the Commissary and have been updating the Post Exchange. They have a mixture of old and new housing units and are refurbishing some of the older units at this time. I do not know as much about the specific housing units as we chose not to live on post. However, the Fort Campbell Army Wives Facebook group is a great place to get more information. The base itself is fairly spread out and straddles the Tennessee /Kentucky state line. The Commissary, Post Exchange (PX), hospital and pharmacy are all centralized at Gate 4. However, some of the other great amenities are found at other gates or even just off post. They have a Food Court in the PX, a Burger King, Taco Bell and a Starbucks as well as several food trucks at lunch time. They have multiple great playgrounds and a splash park near Gate 5 at the Starbucks. The largest playground is at the exchange and has awnings covering it. However, the kids and I love the one at the gate 5 Starbucks and also the playground behind Gate 6. It is tucked back behind a neighborhood in a wooded section. Just ask someone how to get to it the first time because it took me 30 minutes to find the entrance. The Family Life Center located at Gate 1 has lots of great classes for spouses to take and is always sponsoring good events and looking for volunteers. For Mothers of Pre-schoolers, like me, the MOPS group there is very active and its a great way to connect with other wonderful mothers when you get there. There is a horse stable at gate 10 and another Lodge Style Restaurant. There is also an on post movie theater and bowling alley.
If you chose to live off post you then have to decide between the two neighboring cities on either side of the state border Clarksville, TN and Hopkisnsville, KY and Oak Grove, KY. I found many different posts on the differences between the two and was quite confused before we came to explore. If you have the ability to come out prior to your move the I highly encourage you to. If you don’t then hopefully, this information helps. From the most Northern exit on I-24 of Hopksinville to the most Southern exit of Clarksville is no more than a 40 minute drive. Most people though live within a 20 minute interstate drive from exit 11 in Clarksville to exit 86 in Hopkinsville from my experience.
Clarksville, TN boasts many amenities like many good restaurants including the well known chains, a small mall, a great kids play place- Kids n Play, where they can climb through tunnels or play make believe in a small village set up with lots of toys and costumes, museums, art stores and several wonderful walking trails and good gyms. It is on of Tennessee’s larger cities but still has a certain small town feel to it. Thankfully, the housing market there seems to not have been hit as hard by the housing crash but they have been building lots of new homes on the south side of the city during our time here so make sure if you are looking to buy you ask your realtor about the re-sale potential of your new neighborhood as there are so many new houses available. I also read just the other day an article that stated that Google is looking to take over a large solar power plant that was built there several years ago and never used for a data Center. This would also be helpful for the housing market. Nearby Hopkinsville, KY is a small town with a quaint historic district, some fabulous steak houses, and the best meat Processing Company I’ve ever been to. If you want to freshest, tastiest meats around with the best prices you can’t beat Hampton Meat Company, don’t wait to long to try it or you will regret the lost time. There is no mall but they have some chain restaurants, car dealers and a Walmart. Both cities have their own hospitals. Oak Grove, KY is a very small town located just outside of the base. It seems to mainly be populated by Military families or retirees. There are a good number of small rental houses found there and of course, Walmart.
I’ve honestly heard both positive and negative about all three as far as places to live. Initially, my husband was really worried about the commute when we looked at housing. However, we bought off exit 11 in Clarksville and couldn’t be happier with our decision. It is about a 30-35 minutes commute to base but it is only 40 minutes to Opry Mills mall in Nashville. We also looked off exit 8 but found once we moved here that rush hour traffic keeps that exit very backed up with the current construction on it and so Jason actually has less commute than some of his colleagues and it gives him a chance to unwind or finish up work phone conversations on his way home. It is frustrating when needing to come home and get back to base in a timely manner and sometimes I wish we were on base where he could come home for lunch but for the most part I just load the kids up and meet him somewhere instead. We have several neighbors who are also military and so there is still a feeling a camaraderie. In addition, Tennessee has no state income tax so if you are a working spouse that is a consideration. Kentucky has a 6% state income tax but if you are a resident of another state including Tennessee and are only working in Kentucky because of your husbands military service then you do not have to pay KY state income tax.
We are a family who loves adventure and Fort Campbell is in easy travelling distance to lots of great places to visit. As an Army Chaplain Jason is privileged to provide retreats called “Strong Bonds” for active duty soldiers and their families. These are usually in the form of marriage retreats but sometimes single soldier and family retreats are also provided. These retreats are a wonderful way for couples to learn better communication and coping skills for their marriage. They typically run Friday- Sunday and include childcare for the event. I love helping my husband with these retreats and encourage all soldiers and their families both enlisted and Offices to take advantage of them whenever you can as they are a wonderful way to reconnect with your spouse in some amazing places with free Hotel and at least some of your food paid for compliments of the US Army. We try to take advantage of the great destinations near us and have had retreats in Nashville at the Opry Hotel and Franklin, TN, as well as Gatlinburg, TN, French Lick, Indiana at an indoor water park, Memphis, TN and Louisville, KY.
One of the nice things about the Army are four day training holidays and last year I moved to a small critical access hospital in Princeton, Ky working mainly two weekday 24 hour shifts with an occasional weekend shift each month. This allowed us the opportunity to use those training holidays to further explore the area around us. We have visited so many great places close to us as a family starting with Nashville, of course, and including Atlanta, Ga, Stone Mountain, Ga, Lexington, Ky and St. Louis, Mo. Each of these places offered fun activities for both us and the kids. I will try to blog about each trip with some ideas of what we explored there as well as things we would have liked to see but didn’t get the chance.
Updated on December 22, 2015
Introduction- Part II
In April, 2014 I left my home for the first time in 30+ years and started my life as an Army wife. We were assigned to Fort Campbell, KY and I was nervous and excited at the same time for what was to come. Let me say, my time here has in many ways exceeded my expectations. I have made many great friends, had a wonderful job and it is a great area to explore. That’s not to say we haven’t had our challenges as well.
We raced to Fort Campbell from Fort Jackson, SC to get Jason signed in before they changed his orders to Korea. When we arrived at 9 o’clock at night we found that our pet friendly hotel room that we had booked had been given away because we had not checked in by 7 pm??? Of course, then we couldn’t find another pet friendly hotel and we were traveling with a Great Dane and 3 kids. Luckily, I had remembered seeing a post for a new dog kennel starting up on the Fort Campbell Wives Page on Facebook. (If you are moving to Fort Campbell with the Army this is a wonderful resource to find out information) So I called Leah Patterson from “Roll Over Kennels” and she was gracious enough to meet us at the kennel at almost 10:00 at night and to take great care of Parris for us until our house was ready several days later.
The fist month here was like a long vacation for me. My new job didn’t start until the middle of May so I had almost an entire month off to get our house unpacked and enjoy being with the three kids. Jason on the other hand hit the ground running. Fort Campbell is a fast paced unit and his battalion hadn’t had a chaplain in 2 years. On the good side our new home was on the south side of Clarksville and so we could easily drive to Nashville on the weekends to explore. My parents and sister came in for a week to help me settle and we got to tour the Grand Ole Opry with them. If you like Country Music its a great place to visit.
I started work at Jennie Stuart Medical Center Emergency Department in May and in June we found out that our family was growing again. This included its own challenges as I knew nothing of Army medicine and it took some time to figure out how to navigate the system. So in hopes that this helps someone else I will pass on some of my experience. Blanchfield Army Hospital ( BACH) is the on-post hospital. Number one they do not deal with high risk pregnancies at their facility. However, you still have to see an OB on post to get referred to an off post MFM OB. Number two- when I got pregnant it used to be that you had to go on post and have a blood test done to confirm pregnancy, you did not need an appointment for this but it was not well publicized. Now I understand that you can directly contact the OB department with a positive home pregnancy test to schedule your initial appointment which is much better. There is an appointment hotline to call and you can also schedule online. I did not have any experience past my first appointment with the OB office, however, I was seen in L+D one day for concern of ruptured membranes. The staff there was wonderful during my stay and the OB I had couldn’t have been better. Thankfully, It was a false alarm.
Zachary was born in February of 2015 at a hospital in Nashville three days after Melissa’s 5th Birthday. My parents came down to keep the kids and it snowed the entire week. The winter was very cold with temperatures in the negative digits both 2014 and 2015. This winter so far has been much milder and last week it was actually in the mid 70’s with everyone out in their shorts and T-shirts, though this week its starting to turn colder. Thankfully, in May Jason was able to attend a medical ministry course with the Army in San Antonio and I got to fly out for a nice romantic weekend for two. We had a great time there exploring the Spanish missions and the Riverwalk.
In March of 2015 I am sorry to say we lost our beloved Blue Great Dane Parris (Willowrun Magnolia’s Back From Boot Camp) to a small bowel obstruction. She was going through a false pregnancy and decided to eat something in Bobby’s room. All we found was stuffing from whatever toy it was. Her loss was particularly painful for Melissa as she slept in her room every night. Jason and I had gotten her together the January after we met. In June, we welcomed home Anna (Magnolia’s Darth Anna) thanks to Kade Danes (http://kadedanes.com) in Kentucky. Anna has fit right in to the family and is a super sweet girl. Right now she is at a boarding trainer (http://www.thecalmk9.com) until after Christmas and we are having withdrawal. Hopefully, she will come home with some great new manners though. we are looking forward to continuing her training so that she may ultimately be a Certified Service Dog. I would love in the future to breed and train Great Danes as Mobility Service Dogs but unfortunately that is not possible in this phase of my life. I am so happy though that there are so many wonderful Service Dog Organizations around. I am particularly fond of The Service Dog Project (http://www.servicedogproject.org) as they use Great Danes. If you have a moment I encourage you to visit their website and read the story about Bella and George. They are actually visiting the the AKC/Eukanuba challenge this week for George to receive the Humane Funds Award for Canine Excellence. Their story is truly a heartwarming tail of overcoming adversity.
Recently, we found out that Jason has been selected to attend a year long certificate program in Clinical Pastoral Education (CPE). will enable him to serve as a Hospital Chaplain, obviously a role very near and dear to my heart. When I worked as a Hospitalist Jason served as a volunteer chaplain at my hospital. It was amazing to be able to connect our callings in such a unique way and I really look forward to being able to serve together in this way again. The CPE program is offered at three Army Hospitals including Walter Reed, in Bethesda, MD, Brook Army Medical Center, in San Antonio, TX, and Madigan Army Medical Center in Tacoma, WA. that being said we are gearing up for our next PCS. I will keep you posted about how we prepare as we go along. I am already working to clean out our closets of excess clutter and in true Army Wife fashion have finally unpacked the last box from our last move.
Updated on December 22, 2015
Introduction
Our lives are filled with chaos, most of us feeling like we are on a roller coaster ride that never ends. We have ups and we have downs. Sometimes its fun and sometimes we are scared. Sometimes we throw our hands up and scream and sometimes we just enjoy the ride. This blog is dedicated to the loving chaos that fills my life. The journey that our family experiences through the mountains and valley to the loop to loop curves of our coaster as we hold on for dear life. This ride has been filled with great joy and deep sadness. We have overcome many obstacles to follow the path we feel God has called us to and sacrificed each in our own way. We have been blessed with many great friendships and a wonderful, supportive family. Most importantly, we we live our crazy, chaotic life with a great amount of Love.
When I met my husband I was 28 years old and getting ready to start my last year of Residency in Family Medicine. He was on active duty in the Coast Guard and had started his Master’s of Divinity Program at Regent university in Virginia Beach, Va. I was living in my Hometown of Smithfield, Va and planned on joining my Sister and Brother-in-law in private Practice when I graduated residency. I had been attending a wonderful Southern Baptist Church- Harvest Fellowship that was meeting in a local elementary school but was struggling with finding the man God meant for me. I had dated my high school sweetheart on and off for years and finally realized that wasn’t the path I was supposed to be on so I joined Match.com. I prayed nightly for a Godly man as my husband. I bargained, I blamed, I got angry, I pleaded. When I finally accepted that everything would happen in God’s time I was contacted by my husband. We spent weeks talking on the phone before we met. My first date with Jason we went to a small restaurant on the Pagan River just down from my house called Captain Chuckamucks. (If anyone is ever in Smithfield I highly recommend it.) We sat out on a picnic table next to the river and my sweet husband couldn’t hardly string two words together, not a normal occurrence for him at all. We both giggled like we were in high school again. I knew quickly that my life would never be the same. Within weeks we were discussing marriage and the future beyond.
Fast forward a year and we were planning our wedding. I was working as a Hospitalist and Jason had transferred to the Coast Guard reserve to finish his M. Div and work on getting his full time ministry in the Anglican church. We got married at the Walt Disney World Chapel in what can only be termed a Fairy tale wedding. I truly felt like a Princess for the day down to riding in Cinderella’s pumpkin carriage. My nieces were thrilled and my sister, of course, had to join to make sure that they behaved. LOL. We were in the middle of our honeymoon when I started not feeling so well. It didn’t take long after getting home to realize that we had brought home our own little piece of “Disney Magic”. After a stressful pregnancy complicated by hyperemesis gravidarium, preterm labor and bed rest we were beyond blessed to welcome our own Princess Melissa Claire. My first day back at work at the hospital I cried the entire car ride. I loved being a Hospitalist but due to my pregnancy complications my OB recommended finding a job where I wasn’t on my feet as much.
Nine months later we realized that our family was growing again. During my pregnancy Jason and I started further exploring the Orthodox faith. We had grown so much in our faith and found that this was where God was leading us. We were received into ROCOR (Russian Church Outside of Russia) and started working in a mission parish in Virginia Beach, Va. I had joined my Sister and Brother-in law in practice in my hometown and was quickly enjoying the uniqueness of outpatient family based medicine in my Hometown. Even now I miss seeing the patient’s that I have built such wonderful relationships with and so enjoy the luxury of Facebook where I can still watch their families grow from afar. However, it did not seem to be the cure-all for my pregnancy woes. Weighing in at 3lbs 12 oz and coming 9 weeks early and 17 months almost to the hour after his older sister, Bobby looked like a little old man according to my mother and felt like holding air. We spent the first month worrying daily if he was going to eat so that he could come home from the NICU. It took him a while but once he started he never stopped. By 3 months he had caught up to Melissa on his growth chart. He didn’t walk till he was 18 months but that didn’t keep him from getting into everything. Now at 4 years old you can’t tell that he was a preemie. Unfortunately, I developed blood clots after Bobby was born and spent months on blood thinners. It also meant that my pregnancy’s became a much higher risk and I was encouraged to stop where I was. I had the perfect family with two healthy children and luckily one of each. However, God wasn’t quite through with us.
My husband had left the reserve to complete his full time ministry experience and we transferred to a Carpatho-Russian Parrish in Northern North Carolina. It was quite the drive every week from our every week but we found a family of fellow converts there who welcomed us with open arms and a wonderful priest who became both a mentor and friend to us as we continued our journey. April 1st of 2013 I realized that I wasn’t feeling too good. I carried my positive pregnancy test into Jason’s office and told him it was time to make his decision about whether he was going back into the Army. He had been working really hard at getting back into great physical shape and had recently completed his required full time ministry experience. He looked at me like I’d lost my mind. I said do you see this? There are two lines. He thought I had brought home a fake test for and April Fool’s joke from work. He called his recruiter the next day and so began our journey in the United States Army. My pregnancy actually progressed a little better than the previous two and we made it full term. I had to take shots every day to prevent blood clots and I lived on anti-nausea medication but we still made it. However, after Eli was born I had a postpartum hemorrhage and can truly say it was my most difficult c- section. I was still not quite myself when I went back to work two weeks later. In addition, as Jason had been accepted back on active duty, I was leaving my private practice and saying my final goodbyes to so many wonderful patient’s that I had had the privilege to care for for the past 3 years. With the start of the new year came many transitions for both of us.
On New Years day, we flew out to Nashville, Tn on our way to our first duty station at Fort Campbell, KY. We spent a week house hunting and me interviewing for new job opportunities. I was torn becasue I knew we would be doing a great deal of moving with the Army and it had been so hard leaving my private practice that I was scheduled to interview for both Hospitalist and outpatient Family Medicine positions. I had also spoken to a recruiter several weeks prior about the possibility of Emergency Medicine but had not heard anything back from him. However, as we packed the night before our flight I got a call from the Medical Director at an ER near base. I spent an hour on the phone with him and he asked to meet us as the hospital on Sunday which was our only open day during our stay. It was definitely Godly intervention. I loved the Emergency Department and the schedule was great giving me plenty of time home with the kids. When we got home from our trip Jason headed out to CHOBOLIC, not sure that I spelled that right, but it stands for the Chaplain Officer basic course, and I was left to get our house ready to sell and I went back to the Hospital part time to get my skills back up and support us until our move.
In April, the movers packed and loaded our house, I packed and loaded the kids and we said many tearful goodbyes to my family before we headed down to join Jason for his last week of Chaplain School. I was both excited, sad and nervous. Thankfully, the school leaders and their wives put on a spouses class the last week to help us figure it all out. They cover Chaplains roles and responsibility, military ranks and etiquette and our individual role in our husbands career. Plus as an added bonus we all got to repel off the training towers at the end. I met a great groups of chaplain’s spouses during that week from all walks of life and was able to re-connect with some of our own friends from Jason’s time in Seminary. The course itself helped to relieve my anxiety about the transition and gave me great hope for the future. Of course as is the Army way there is always a last minute change. The day before graduation as I was sitting at the base playground with the kids I get a call from my husband. “Kari? How do you feel about Korea?” A chaplain was needed emergently to fill an assignment in Korea and of the group of chaplains going active duty Jason was the only one with prior service experience that was eligible. I had only a few minutes to process the news before Jason had to give his final answer. I remember saying a quick prayer that God help me know the right path and then I said- if its what God wants I’m ok with it. Jason got off the phone and told his commander if no one else would do it he would. No one else volunteered and so Jason was told he would receive his new orders the next day. We went to Graduation expecting at any minute to be told we or just he would be heading to Korea but the never showed up. Jason asked his commanders what to do and they said get in the car and drive straight to Fort Campbell and sign in. Once there they would fight to keep him there; and that’s what we did.
More to come on our transition to life at For Campbell in Part II.